A Life of Care Giving – Becoming an Enlightened Caregiver

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The notion that parents cherish all their children equally — or at least say they do — is so entrenched in our culture that colleagues warned Karl Pillemer, a gerontologist at Cornell University embarking on the first of many studies of family favoritism, that his research would prove futile. No mother, they insisted, would admit to caring more for one son or daughter than another.

So much for that. His team’s interviewers, talking to mothers ages 65 to 75 in the Boston area about their adult offspring, found that most were perfectly willing to name favorites. “Most mothers have very distinct preferences,” Dr. Pillemer said. “There’s one to whom they feel most emotionally close . . .

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FAMILY & RELATIONSHIPS/AGING

“Informative. Complete. And practical. This book will guide family caregivers through the surprisingly complex world of senior care.”-MEHMET OZ, M.D., New York Times bestselling coauthor of YOU: The Owner’s Manual: The Complete All-in-One Care Guide

Choosing the best care for your aging parents and other seniors in your life is not only complex, with multiple options available, it’s also highly personal and often emotional. This essential resource-written by the founders of Home Instead Senior Care, the world’s largest provider of nonmedical care for seniors-guides you through a comprehensive range of things to consider, step by step, so you can make better informed decisions and be confident that the senior in your life is receiving the best care possible. Checklists and diagnostics will help you:

• Decide if at-home care is the right choice for you and your loved ones
• Evaluate the pros and cons of retirement communities, adult care centers, nonmedical caregivers, assisted living facilities, nursing homes, and hospice
• Determine the costs of senior care options and find helpful support networks

“This is not just another book about caring for aging parents. It’s a great reference you’ll use again and again. Stages doesn’t shy away from the hard questions. Rather, it shows you how to confront them.”-SUZANNE MINTZ, President/CEO, National Family Caregivers Association

All of the authors’ profits from the sale of this book will be donated to the Home Instead Senior Care Foundation.

Paul and Lori Hogan founded Home Instead Senior Care in 1994. Now with 850 offices in 15 countries, Home Instead is recognized as a global leader and authority on senior care. Visit them at www.stagesofseniorcare.com.

Cover image Robert Ervin Photography Inc.

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The US Census Bureau tells us that the retired and retiring populations are in the majority. Those born between 1945 and 1964 are now tasked with the care of the previous generation, from choosing housing to selecting final resting place. Julie-Allyson Ieron, through personal experience and extensive interviews and research, has compiled a resource that will inform as well as delight. Yes, delight! Choose from chapters such as:1 . Grandpa Can’t Jump (slowing down)2 . Swingin’ Seniors (independence as long as possible)3 . The Bionic Parent (21st-century medical miracles)4 . Visiting Nurse Kratchet (rehab)5 . Grumpy Old Men (and Women) (complaining)6 . Where Everybody Knows Your Name (chronic doctor’s office visits)7 . An Achy, Breaky Heart (life-threatening medical issues)8 . Showdown @ High Noon (patient advocate)9 . He’s Fallen and Can’t Get Up (living alone)10 . Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner? (moving in)11 . Bringing Up Baby (caregivers with children)12 . Taming the Grinch (anger)Although this can be an overwhelming time of life, it can be managed and even enjoyed. If you are the pickle in the middle of the sandwich generation, this book is for you!

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There are a lot of issues to consider as our loved ones get older. From in-home care to assisted living facilities, there are myriad options available – and each person’s needs are unique. Family members need a resource that will answer all of their questions and ease them through this often-complicated transition. This helpful handbook guides concerned children as they: decide which level of care is best for their parent; maintain communication and discuss difficult topics; handle home safety issues; manage transportation; find and work with a primary-care physician; navigate insurance paperwork; handle legal issues and questions; and other sensitive issues. From setting up a support network to avoiding scams, this informative guide will help a family decide on – and implement – the best care options for their loved ones.

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I came across this article the other day. I found it because it uses the same title as my blog. When I read it, I thought I must have written it and forgot. It is beautifully written and I encourage you to take a look. It’s short and a very nice read.

October 2007
10:00 a.m. She’s sleeping more and more and waking up later and later every day. She has forgotten how to brush her teeth, so I put the paste on her brush and help her make up and down motions over her teeth. She doesn’t want to bathe this morning, so we skip over that and get dressed. I coax her to place her arms in the sleeves of her blouse and her legs in the pants. She allows me to brush her hair. 11:00 I sit her down at the breakfast table and put a cup of coffee and today’s newspaper in front of her . (go here). .